The world is changing. Not to sound ill-advisedly sentimental, but the Human Touch is quickly going the way of the Triceratops. Today our consensual twin summits – Efficiency and Optimization – are turning us into almost childlike fans of automata. Robots, algorithms, and computer-generated flapdoodle are obsoleting such exotica as warm-blooded human beings walking through […]
Richard Weston-Smith is a co-founder & COO of One805 – alongside cofounder/CEO Kirsten Cavendish Weston-Smith and cofounder/CFO John J. Thyne III. What exactly did these folks cofound? It’s a fair question. The nearly indescribable One805 can rightly be called First Responder to our First Responders. Like many nouns in the English language, though, First Responder […]
Many of our most inspiring origin stories begin with a guy frantically trying to get out of L.A. This is one of those. “My dad and his best friend were doing life transition,” Garret Gustason neatly summarizes. This is an article about a company called The Furniture Gallery by Mattress Mike, which is the mature […]
Often I think my poor oldheartHas given up for goodAnd then I see a brave new face,I glimpse some new neighborhood..– Mancini/Mercer And here we are again. Another …. New Year?! This is a reportedly cyclical occurrence, begat by an explosion that, for reasons I’ve stopped trying to grasp, gave birth to both Time itself […]
On the evening of Thursday, December 12, an unveiling took place in the heart of our Upper Village. RH Montecito – The Gallery at the Old Firehouse opened its doors with a flourish and in poured a colorful sampling of gifted local burghers, noted interior designers, and other species of happy creative gravitas – all […]
Christmas day of ‘68 began like most days; with a guy bellowing singsong prayers in the dark from a mosque somewhere just off base. The mounted lo-fi bullhorn gave the already mysterioso liturgy a surreal 1930s radio feel – think “Libyan Rudy Vallee” if that helps. If that doesn’t help, I get it. Though we’d […]
Most towns with an “Upper” and “Lower” Village release the buildup of civic tension by staging occasional rumbles – West Side Story style. We all remember with great fondness the finger-snapping Pierre Lafond crew pirouetting in tight formation as they surrounded international master jeweler Daniel Gibbings – and the high-kicking Grande Battement with which Gibbings […]
The “Holidays” show up every year. If Life seems cyclical that could be – in part – because we live on a spinning ball, if you can imagine. So it’s December. Again. The year-end hullabaloo (to generalize) always gets me thinking about the throngs of people, the millions of hidden lives, the unsurfaced stories that […]
Now that Towbes Plaza has been ceremonially launched with an enormous pair of scissors, here comes the Local Author Book Festival to break the place in! Santa Barbara is unfairly over-blessed by the g*ds of literary talent, and here’s a chance to walk among these leading lights. Poets, novelists, authors all – some 40 of […]
“There’s a new security blanket in town.” Given the stakes, it’s just possible that a more dramatic opening is called for. But this operation – Post Alarm Systems – does summon the image of a protective force field being gently draped over Montecito and environs. Through their 68 years of providing innovative security solutions in […]
A wintry evening and you are momentarily alone. Your friends will be by soon to collect you. You’re all headed to starry Coast Village Road, where your lovely gang will walk, arms linked, straight into the welcoming embrace of the lamplit Lower Village. For now, though, you’re lost in reflection. December. Another year! Cupping your […]
Tony Soprano: You know we’re the only country in the world where the pursuit of happiness is guaranteed in writing? You believe that? Bunch of $%@! spoiled brats. Where’s my happiness then? Dr. Melfi: It’s the pursuit that’s guaranteed. Tony Soprano: Yeah… always a $%@! loophole, right? A dear friend asked me once; “Jeff, do […]
You’re driving south on the 101, headed down to the celebrated City of Angles (or whatever it’s called) when you suddenly get a hankering for what your grandpa used to call “a sody pop”. Happily, a left-lane exit looms just there – the deceptively nondescript Exit 94B – and you ease over and hop off […]
My friend and I meet one evening at a seafood place – one of those enormous restaurant/bars with maritime junk hung all over the place in case you forget the theme. Tonight it is thronged and seething, the dank air heavy with excited human congress. The World Series is hollering out of a dozen enormous […]
Many years ago I was gamboling about the Peabody Charter school playground with my toddler, a redheaded sunflower (today a 6’ grizzled Viking). At a given moment, another little boy of about six years old approached out of the blue, stood before me, and without preamble began declaiming. “There’s no such thing as ghosts or […]
A movie producer named Gary Binkow (Finding Neverland, The Nanny Diaries, V/H/S, etc.) stopped in for a routine physical, at whose conclusion his doctor blandly recommended a preemptive cholesterol med. “I was prescribed Lipitor,” Binkow says with a puzzled half grin. “It was so easy for my doctor to say, ‘…Look, you’re very early and […]
Steel magnate Andrew Carnegie made a lot of money and couldn’t get rid of it fast enough. “The man who dies rich dies disgraced,” he wrote, and lived his credo. His stubbornly stated goal was to give away – in his lifetime – his entire fortune to causes which he felt would raise and edify […]
This political season is sufficiently fraught that your fraidy-cat columnist is going to steer well clear of the melee and write about something we can all agree on. I’m talking of course about the inarguable virtues of Communism. Ha Ha Ha. Kidding. As has been lightly touched upon in endless cocktail party conversations (and more […]
Beloved local restaurant/living room Via Vai lost its Upper Village lease following a three-decade run. As the longtime crew tearily bade their homestead farewell, artist Carlos Pillado moved about the twilit rooms in a cloud of memory, carefully removing his art from the walls. “The day that I took down my paintings, I cried. That […]
Your situation is mildly frustrating but not uncommon:your soul is a supernova, throwing fire and creativity and moment-by-moment enthusiasm – but your chassis is showing its wear through the twin rigors of Life and Love. The Age of Joyous Wisdom tends to have an overlap with the Age of Emollients. All you want – all […]
Legendary Decorator, beloved villager, and Charlie Munger muse Penny Bianchi is herself a striking figure – a living, breathing design element in her own right. The indescribable Bianchi casually radiates charm, wit, joy – and the fauvist Je ne sais quoi one experiences when falling into a painting by Chagall. To madly understate it, there […]
By 1973 I had a red Panasonic ball radio parked in the darkened little hutch that was built into the headboard of my bed, and was discovering both the inchoate power of music, and words like ‘inchoate’. I’d bought my first LP with my own money, Mike Oldfield’s Tubular Bells, played McCartneys’ RAM album till […]
The decorous sunken lawn in front of Pierre Lafond is ordinarily a still point of shade-dappled peace, the calming eye of any given day’s hurricane. The trees lean in with leafy solicitude, birdsong seasons the scented air, and the good people of Montecito engage in lively conversation, gesturing and gabbing. Into this bucolic set piece […]
Our friends were out of town and had graciously loaned us their home while ours was being bombed for termites—a species we’ve completely conquered in the Darwinian Race To the Top®, except for the poison-filled circus tents we’re occasionally obliged to flee with our belongings. On the third day the tent was removed and that night […]
The Montecito Club is unique – a sometimes-tiring adjective that doesn’t say a helluva lot. “How unique?” Thank you for asking. For starters, the MC’s Director of Agronomy is a guy named Tennessee McBroom, if you can imagine. McBroom is the soil and turf scientist whose Hulk-like green thumb has helped elevate the Montecito Club […]
In its attempt to reconcile General Relativity with the quantum mechanical environment, supergravity places an upper limit on the number of dimensions at 11. Crazy sounding? You betcha. What we really want to avoid, though, is that not-uncommon confusion that believes Supergravity has some meaningful intersection with the Minimal Supersymmetric Standard Model. Yeah, as IF. […]
Brett Matthews is showing me around Kate Farms’ Innovation and Quality Center, a lab and office complex the size of an airplane hangar. Bewilderingly complex machines festooned with tubes are being tended to by folks in clean room suits. We stop outside a sealed central workspace and stare through a glass wall. The largish, inelegant […]
On a lark, Michael and Gabriella Salsbury walked into Madame Rosinka’s fortune-telling shopfront on Stearns Wharf in Santa Barbara. Rudderless and adrift on the open ocean of unspeakable parental sorrow, the couple were emphatically not looking to Madame Rosinka for the answers that had otherwise so eluded them. The Salsburys were not seekers after the […]
The facts are strange. Our Earth is a largish dirt-covered rock, adrift in an endless, freezing vacuum and handily located next to an enormous lamp which ceaselessly dumps life-enabling energy onto our hills, valleys, and fleabag motels. For about 430 million years our dirt-covered rock has been busily sprouting a kingdom of living flora whose […]
My rebellious teen years formed me. I was an iconoclast, an outlier, a pugnacious and angry loner dancing on the knife edge of chaos. Refusing to play the idiot game, I skulked around the outskirts of the Established Order and its meaningless rules of conduct, taking wild, ferocious swings at this stupid world and its […]
Newish Montecitan Susan Sofronas – recently arrived from the isle of Manhattan – is settling in nicely. She already adores our little woodland getaway, and as we sip java at sun-soaked Bree’osh on Coast Village, she charmingly parses her personal Tale of Two Cities with open delight. “If you think of New York City – […]
“Estate Management.” You just know this is one of those deceptively tidy terms that contains worlds. Surely one approach to grasping the Estate Management space would be to put the question to an actual Estate Manager. “What constitutes a typical day?” Or maybe not. “Every single day is different,” says Kelly Warner with something like […]
“Home.” It’s complicated. Home is where the heart is, and where you hang your hat. Home is where – when our best intentions go astray – the chickens come to roost. Are the words House and Home interchangeable? Only loosely. “House” is a structural term, an object subject to space, time, and mortgage amortization. “Home” […]
Stephanie Kaster has been our village’s Empress of Architectural Interiors for quite a little while now. Is Kaster an actual Empress? No. For one thing, that would make our deciduous little whistlestop an Empire, which hardly suits the place. Does Kaster comport herself like an Empress? If bounding across the room with arms outstretched in […]
‘The Devil in My Friend’ by Ivor Davis Malibu has been called a colony, an enclave, and several other things along an overwrought continuum that can stray into bad poetry. The very idea of Malibu can be so frankly dazzling it beggars reliable description, this macabre strip of trillion-dollar stilted waterfront huts peopled by reclusive […]
Yes, there are people in the area you are more likely to have heard of than to have actually met. Jeff Bridges. Carol Burnett. Beloved local mononyms Ellen, Oprah, and Harry. Steven Gilbar is in this category, but with a caveat. The name rings a deafening bell, but where the hell have you heard it? […]
Troubled Surf legend Miki Dora – the Dark Prince of Malibu – remains a cipher. His lifelong desire to live in the moment has made him a mythic figure in the surf pantheon; a stature that in his lifetime royally pissed him off. Pop culture shorthand has reduced Dora to a James Dean for the […]
If you’ve ever watched David Lean’s legendary Lawrence of Arabia on a “hand-held device” (a noun-hyphenate that describes lots of swell gadgets these days) you will have noticed that the film’s breathtaking Battle of Aqaba looks like a bunch of ants streaming across a baloney sandwich. Is cinematic splendor about scale? Yeah, partly. It’s also […]
A Jew and a Palestinian – women, of course – embrace in an otherwise nondescript conference room in UCSB’s Humanities Building. This is not a gesture, not a ceremonial cue for a Special Effect Peace to flood the room like a digital sunrise, not a performative, choreographed moment ablaze with Symbol. Dorit Cypis and Rula […]
The human race can just get over itself now. On the other hand we are the exalted inventors of the Lunar Lander and Franco-American Spaghetti-Os™. This is the tormenting dichotomy of our species. We’re complicated, embarrassed, self-regarding busybodies who have daubed the whole of our vast canvas with the overexcited brushstrokes of a sugared-up preschooler, […]