On Retreat: Hearing Your Inner Truth Through Peace and Time Away

Sometimes, taking time away to be quiet and introspective is exactly what’s called for. This might be simply when you’ve been working hard and need a break. Or, in response to a significant event like a big birthday, a career change, or when the kids leave home. It might be precipitated by a health issue, the end of a relationship, the loss of a loved one, a major disappointment or even a celebratory event. These landmark moments are opportunities to assess where you’ve been, what’s important, and where you’re going. Time away, on retreat, helps you do this. 

I spent the summer as a guest at the Ocamora Retreat Center in the foothills of New Mexico’s Sangre de Cristo Mountains. Staying in an adobe cottage with long range views of prairie to the East and red-rocked cliffs to the West, I spent a lot of time in solitude. I was also offering somatic massage to facilitate the summer program. Both on a retreat myself and part of the retreat experience for people from all over the country, it was an immersion course in the wisdom of taking time away. As I experienced deep calm take root in my core, I witnessed this happen over and over in specific ways for each of the retreat participants. Wanting to know more about the process, I sat down with Diane Haug – longtime retreat leader and executive director of the Ocamora program.

Q. Why is time away so important?

A. The pace, density, and immediacy of our postmodern, digitized lives doesn’t allow us the time or space to rest deeply and connect with our essential selves. Even when we get away on vacation, we’re still on schedule, sending texts, emails, and photos to friends, family, and work colleagues. Getting away, truly getting away to a place like Ocamora gives people the chance to step out of the tyranny of time. And, when people feel supported in stepping away and slowing down, they begin to make the shift from busy to quiet, from external to internal. 

How do you facilitate this shift from busy to quiet, external to internal? 

Our weeklong programs are designed to encourage transformational insight and healing. Before people even arrive, we address expectations and set the tone with information about the facility, weather, travel, setting, and program. Although travel from home to Ocamora may only take a few hours, it can take more time to actually “land” here. Transit is part of the process and, once here, it continues as participants feel their way into the space, the quietude, the wildness of the landscape, and simplicity of the facilities. When people are asked to step away from their phones and familiar routines, it takes time to adjust. 

I use two powerful practices to facilitate quiet introspection – sharing in council circle and sitting in contemplative silence. Being in circle encourages people to drop into a place of deep listening where they can access unconditional regard for the experience of each other – and themselves. Sitting – before and after activities – in breathing meditation helps the mind shift from the crowded space of endless thinking to the timeless space of just being in present time.

Could you say more about this phrase “timeless space?”

The quiet setting of Ocamora, immersed in the intimacy of the natural world, helps participants slow down enough to clear their lens of perception. Instead of images and agendas flooding the airwaves, they can open their senses to the vast range of plant life, chorus of birdsong, and sweet smell of sage. The expansive landscape and big weather – with clouds coming and going, light shifting and changing – capture our attention and invite us to be present. Here, connected to all life, in timeless space, we can access a timeless sense of self. 

And have you witnessed retreats change people’s lives? 

Many people come to a retreat at a pivotal moment, often asking: “Who am I?” Meeting them with the expertise, setting, and processes that encourage a deeper sense of self helps them answer this question. Throughout the retreat, listening to this deeper sense of self gives them specific guidance about what needs to be released and where healing needs happen. When people return home with a new sense of self and the tools to keep listening, it changes their lives. It’s an honor to witness the personal epiphanies and transformational healing that happens, over and over again.

Taking Time Back

Being on retreat with Diane and the other retreat facilitators at Ocamora has reminded me of the importance of taking time away to chill out and reset every once in a while. Away from the familiar routes and routines, I took time to listen to the wind in the trees and elk in the meadow. Away from the constant chatter of newsfeeds, my inner chatter quieted down. Away from traffic and parking lots, I could relax and linger in present time. Here it was easy to feel how time comes and goes just like the big old puffy clouds. As I get ready to come back home, I feel renewed, refreshed, and ready to do what comes next. 

Over the past 50 years, retreat centers have been set up around the country to support mental, spiritual and physical well-being. Today, with schedules so jam-packed and little time for reflection at a deep personal level, going on retreat might be the most sensible thing to do – for body, mind, and spirit. If this sounds appealing, why not set up time away for a personal retreat? There are lots of excellent choices depending on your needs and interests. Just ask a friend for a recommendation or go on the internet and make a reservation. Once it’s on the calendar, just knowing it’s scheduled feels like a gift to yourself. 

Note: Pattie Cavalletto left Santa Barbara in 1980 to pursue a dream of creating a retreat center where people could come together to find peace and healing. With the help of longtime friend and partner, Michael Broome, she found the perfect setting in Northern New Mexico to build the Ocamora Retreat Center. Beautifully designed and simply constructed, the log and adobe buildings are surrounded by lush landscaping, tucked into the natural setting. Over time, Ocamora has been a place where people can be close to nature, close to spirit, in silent awareness. Forty years later, Pattie’s vision of people circling on a lawn in sacred ceremony has become a reality.