Annual Event Creates Sacred Space in Montecito to Grieve and Honor Those We Miss

With the holiday season in full swing, it’s an exciting time for many of us to be thinking about all the wonderful memories we’ll be making with our close friends and family members.

This isn’t the case for everyone. Unfortunately, the holiday season can be extremely difficult and painful for those who feel an empty and aching space in their hearts for a loved one who has passed away and won’t be a part of this year’s annual holiday traditions. Though grief is a normal part of life, it can be especially difficult to cope with loss during one of the most joyous times of the year. 

It is in the spirit of shared loss and healing that we began our free Light Up a Life ceremony in Montecito. It allows all of us a path to integrate our loved ones into the holiday through these sacred events and experience that loss and love with others who are experiencing the same thing. 

A small committee launched Light Up a Life in Montecito six years ago, including Sharon Byrne, former executive director of the Montecito Association, and with support from Montecito Fire.

This Year’s Light Up a Life event in Montecito is on December 6 at the Upper Village Green (on the corner of San Ysidro and East Valley) and will feature special speakers and guests, musical entertainment including Cold Spring School Chorus, and the lighting of a memorial tree. Light Up a Life is free and open to everyone. 

We look forward to seeing you there.  

Tips for Navigating the Holidays After the Loss of a Loved One

Hospice of Santa Barbara encourages our community to not just “get through” the holidays, but to embrace the season as a time for healing. Here are a few tips we hope will be helpful to you or someone you care about: 

As the holidays near, you should acknowledge that there will be hard times ahead as you mourn your loved one. Remember that everyone grieves differently, and that it’s okay to not feel okay. If there are children in your family who are also coping with loss, focus on their needs and help them process through their grief. 

Make a conscious decision when it comes to carrying on your holiday traditions or consider starting new ones. Continuing the old traditions may help keep your loved one’s memory alive, but setting new ones may help you to move on. 

Honor your loved one’s memory, whether it is through a beloved holiday tradition, or by sharing stories about them with your friends. Remember that although they are gone, their memory will always live on in your heart. 

Don’t forget to take care of yourself by getting a proper amount of sleep, eating healthily, and exercising when you can, but without forcing too much of your energy. Taking care of your body will help alleviate stress and improve your overall well-being. 

Surround yourself with a supportive community that will be with you every step of the way as you cope with your grief. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it.