An Interview with Don MacMannis, PhD Songs with a Message

Don MacMannis, (aka Dr. Mac) has wanted to work with children for as long as he can remember. He tells the story of sitting in a pre-med class at Dartmouth, thinking he was going to be a pediatrician, when it dawned on him that child psychology was his life’s true work. And so began a journey that led to a PhD in Clinical Psychology and work for the past 42 years at the Family Therapy Institute (FTI) of Santa Barbara with his wife, Debra Manchester. Don, Debra, and the FTI staff are recognized leaders in the field of family therapy – encouraging healthy family systems and the social-emotional well-being of children. 

In addition to helping thousands of families grow and become whole, in recent years Dr. Mac has written and produced over 50 “Happy Kids Songs” and the play Elementary School Musical, designed to entertain and teach fun lessons in social-emotional well-being. Because themes are taken from issues kids bring to his therapeutic practice, the process begins with an intention. Once he finds a “hook” to make the song catchy, he fills in the gaps. Often, on a walk or in the middle of the night, what comes next just seems to appear. For Don, “in order to get the magic, I have to step aside – open up and listen. Sometimes, when I’m stuck and don’t know where to go next, moving the body gets it unstuck.” Once the composition has taken shape, Craig Dobbin (NCIS, Shark Week) creates a polished arrangement. Kids’ auditions and rehearsals take place in his Montecito home, and the final touch happens when local singer Lois Mahalia (“Smile,” “Build Me a Window”) lays in some soulful background vocals.

“The really fun part of writing children’s music is that I can write in a diversity of styles – from rock to rap, country, pop, or reggae – allowing me a way to be playful and match a song’s theme to a specific musical style!”

Although Dr. Mac’s clinical work has been primarily focused on parenting with kids with behavioral challenges, he has seen a dramatic increase of children with fears and anxiety. One of his passions has been the development of a version of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for kids. CBT teaches people how to overcome negative thinking patterns. Being able to do this is important for anyone living in an uncertain, divisive world – especially for children. The songs and procedures he’s developed teach kids how to overcome anxiety by becoming the “boss of their thoughts.”

“This music is so inviting and upbeat, kids may not notice it’s teaching them a thing or two about sharing and kindness as they bop to the beats.” – Parenting Magazine

Brain science shows us why songs might be a good way to deliver messages. Simplistically, when you listen to music, it lights up numerous areas of the brain. Add words and the cognitive brain comes online to decipher context and meaning. A few years ago, Dr. Mac received a grant to test this out in a classroom setting. With funds in hand, he trained and supervised college students to use the songs in the classroom. Working with teachers and schools was a natural fit because, as every educator knows, when emotions get triggered at home or on the playground, they get carried over to the classroom, and co-opt the brain’s facility for new learning. Because songs are an effective way to “name and claim” what’s going on, they help kids shift from strong feelings to clearer thinking. The results of this study showed a boost in social and emotional learning – for the kids as well as their teachers and parents. Like any catchy jingle, upbeat and positive messages have the potential to boost performance and happiness. 

“Music is one of the most powerful vehicles for learning and change. It can ground concepts in ways that we don’t forget. People can still remember the words of songs they heard decades ago.”

Don’s songs have won numerous awards and are being used in social-emotional learning programs across the country. His award-winning play, Elementary School Musical, has been called “edutainment at its best.” A tailor-made resource for schools, it’s about kids needing to cooperate to help a sick dog and, along the way, dealing with themes such as positive thinking, shyness, fears, gratitude, kindness, and celebrating differences. This delightful combination of performance, music, and timely messages can be found at www.elementarymusical.com.

“The key is entertainment first, and then slip in the message. If it isn’t entertaining and uplifting, kids won’t listen, or parents will be turned off.”

Dr. Mac’s playlist of “Happy Kids Songs” includes over 50 songs covering a wide range of social and emotional themes. He generously offers this playlist for free at www.happykidssongs.com. Check it out, find a song that connects, and give it a listen. And, don’t miss the most recent additions “One People” and “Celebration Time” featuring local kid stars Sienna Shalhoub (finalist in the Santa Barbara Teen Star contest), Samara Shalhoub, Taylor Lott, Marion Cobell, Eden Cobell, and Evie Byrne, with Lois Mahalia on background vocals. These songs are professionally produced, delightfully engaging, and contain a timely message about healing our divisions and cultivating a positive outlook. 

From the song “One People”:

Now no more blaming games,
there’s no one to condemn,
No more calling names or 
thinking us and them,”
Arm in arm we’ll carry out
new plans for the planet.
We heard Mother Nature shout: 
Stop takin’ me for granted.”
It’s the time to care for all,
and everything around us
Hear Mother Nature’s call and
let her love surround us. 

Don MacMannis, PhD is a child and family psychologist, Clinical Director of the Family Therapy Institute of Santa Barbara, and co-author of two highly acclaimed books: How’s Your Family Really Doing?: 10 Keys to a Happy Loving Family and Who’s the Boss? The Win-Win Way to Parent Your Defiant Strong-Willed Child. His online course, “Parenting Spirited Strong-Willed Kids” is attended by parents internationally. He was music director, scriptwriter, and songwriter for the PBS hit series, Jay Jay the Jet Plane, and continues to share his wisdom and talent in his clinical practice and writing songs for kids.