Seductive Games, with Mindful Intention

Anyone who has attended any of Lisa Citore‘s Anima offerings of Women’s Ritual Theater is aware of the solid mind-body-spirit connection exemplified by the self-described “pleasure activist,” writer, sex educator, and healer brings to her work, whether in the field of performance art or sacred sexuality workshops, or anything between. But for the last several years, the only way to get direct experience with Citore field of expertise was to sign up for deep dive weekend (or longer) workshops, many of which are only for women. But now, Citore has created a new entry point called “Tantra Games: Mindful Connecting”, a Tantra Puja (ceremony)-inspired event that offers a mix of playful exercises to create more conscious and meaningful encounters.

The bi-monthly two-hour workshops, which began in March at Yoga Soup, are sort of like a cross between Authentic Relating Games – the mostly verbal encounters into present-moment connection that are led by Simon Darcy and Tamra Rutherford at the same studio – and Citore’s more overtly sexuality exploring seminars, meant to be safe space for participants to engage in exercises that range from playful and flirty to sensual to soulful.

“The Authentic Games are powerful, but for me connection is much more nonverbal,” Citore explained over the phone while driving back from leading a women’s weekend in the Bay Area. “My love language begins with eye-gazing. I wanted to do something that was playing with other methods of connecting beyond words and bring in a playfulness, reducing the pressures that can come up when we’re meeting people… There are all different levels of depth, and steps along the way of attraction. All of them are fascinating to me.”

The concept is to create a temporary community that usually happens at festivals such as Lucidity or Burning Man, where “you assume there’s a friendliness,” said Citore, who will lead Tantra Games with her devoted partner Len Van Nostrand, a psychotherapist, counselor, and guide who founded Full Spectrum Recovery. “Then you feel safe in venturing into social experiments, playing in that way, bringing in those aspects of interaction where we are not just talking, and sharing who we are beyond words.” Creating a no-risk arena means that “you just have whatever experience you do in the moment and then let it go when the evening is over. That can make you feel safe to be open. You can be yourself, try out different things, practice a new way of being with someone in the area of attraction and chemistry – or not – cultivating aliveness while still being authentic with yourself and practicing boundaries.”

While much of her work involves deep confrontations of sexual exploration, the events at Yoga Soup are “very light” in comparison, Citore said. The practices at Tantra Games involve pairing up with different partners throughout the evening to experiment with anything from improv dance to a masculine/feminine forgiveness ritual where the communication takes place while hands are on one another’s hearts. In March, there was a practice where one participant whispered words of endearment/attraction into their partner’s ears – but using gibberish in a foreign language. Another activity involves being witnessed and witnessing someone else with no touching as they called up their own sexual energy, as well as a heart-felt meditations such as a tantra breath circuit. All are designed to inspire authenticity, vulnerability, acceptance, and presence.

“It’s very mild,” she said. “The main idea is to bring in playful ways to create pleasure energy. There’s no goal. You get to practice in the moment and be with the feelings that come up along the way.” The Tantra Games are “like a fun version of the mating dance, a way to take the pressure off, because there’s no agenda, just an innocence and playfulness and curiosity. You get to see how you show up.”

Tantra Games: Mindful Connecting takes place 7 to 9 pm on Friday, May 25, at Yoga Soup. Admission is $18 in advance or $25 day of. Call 965-8811 or visit www.yogasoup.com/events.

Soup’s on!

It’s a busy weekend for events beyond the typical assorted asanas over at Yoga Soup, the expansive studio/shoppe around the corner from Santa Barbara Roasting Company, beginning with a women-only afternoon with Lamara Heartwell. Wisdom Weavers: An Embodiment Journey For Women, which takes place 2:30 to 7:30 pm on Saturday, May 26, finds females joining forces for an easier, more effective, and more fun avenue to strengthen and grow capacity to embody our feminine nature: wild, wise, fierce, loving, and free. Participants will co-create a nurturing space to shed old ways of being and practice various movement based/body-centered methods to support coming home to yourself, resting into your body, and grounding into your essence. According to Heartwell, the offering is geared as the beginning of a movement for women called Wise Women Unite! Admission is $65 in advance, or $75 day-of.

In & Out

Yoga Soup founder/owner Eddie Ellner takes over at 7 pm that night for one of his popular Ecstatic Breathing events. A few minutes of gentle yoga is followed by an hour of breathing, a simple process where participants merely lie on their backs and breathe to a selection of music designed to accelerate and amplify the breath. The practice induces what Ellner ways “can most accurately be called a non-ordinary state of consciousness…. The experience itself will provide its own meaning and insight.” The takeaway is a tool that is immediately available at all times. Admission is $30.

ACT Now

Dr. Diana Hill, a licensed clinical psychologist who majored in biopsychology at UCSB before earning a master’s and Ph.D. at University of Colorado in the similar scholarly spiritual community of Boulder, has integrated firmly into the local community upon her return to town. Hill filled in for Radhule Weininger at the regular One Dharms Sangha Tuesday meditation this week, leading with the topic of “Limbic Hijack”, employing tools to “sooth the over-driven threat-ridden brain” and exploring the neuropsychology of compassion threat, drive, and safety systems. She’ll take a deeper dive on Sunday afternoon, May 27, at Yoga Soup, with Cultivating Psychological Flexibility. The hands-on, evidence-based workshop in Acceptance and Commitment Training (ACT) will apply cutting-edge science of behavior change with the heart and wisdom of acceptance and mindfulness – an effective synthesis she also applies in her private practice. The event will introduce the six core processes of ACT: Acceptance, Contact with the Present Moment, Cognitive Diffusion, Values Clarification, Self-As-Context, and Committed Action. Participants will learn to become “psychologically flexible” by identifying personal values and using mindfulness, acceptance, thought diffusion, and committed action to direct your life toward what is important to you. The 1 to 4 pm workshop costs $65. Call 669-8182 or visit www.drdianahill.com for more info.

Observing the Orb

Winding up the weekend, Patrick San Francesco returns to Yoga Soup to offer a Full Moon Meditation (which will also be globally live-streamed) followed by a talk and Q&A on “Coping with Crisis and Stress in Life”. San Francesco, founder and chairman of the Samarpan Foundation – which offers humanitarian, environmental, and ecological crisis response – will then offer individual healing for participants on site. Proceeds from the $25 fee for the 7:30 to 9:30 pm gathering go to the foundation. Yoga Soup is located at 28 Parker Way. For more information or to register online for any of the events, visit www.yogasoup.com/events or call 965-8811.

Cosmic Caravan Kirtan

Shake things up from the inside out at the Santa Barbara Yoga Center on Friday, May 25, through the power of sound and vibration with an evening of Kirtan – devotional singing and chanting of mantras. Astrud Castillo, a celebrated Kirtan Wallah based in San Francisco who practices and teaches Bhakti Yoga to yoga teachers in training, has more than 20 years of experience meditating on mantras that for her are like road maps that lead directly to the source, the heart, dating back to her time in New York City. Castillo and her Cosmic Caravan – Nicholas Soter on guitar, Jun Ishimuro on flute, and Ajaya Davidson on drum – will lead the practice of chanting mantras from 7:30 to 9 pm at Santa Barbara original yoga studio, located at 32 E. Micheltorena St. Admission is $20. Call 965-6045 or visit www.santabarbarayogacenter.com.

NVC Seeks RSVP

The Non-Violent Communications study group meets for a second consecutive Sunday as a special fifth week of the month this weekend to practice the skills of NVC that offers healing of self and relationships via learning to communicate using language that honors and values everyone’s needs, employing empathy, compassion, and honesty instead of shame, blame, and domination. Although the meetings take place at a private home in Goleta, they are open to all, whether you have experience in practicing NVC or have read any of the NVC developer Marshall Rosenberg’s books. Activities at the 3 to 5:30 pm gatherings include a check-in, “empathy exchange,” an NVC-related game or exercise, and more. The facilitators – Catherine Cooley and Lesley Weinstock – are eager to expand the outreach and spread the heart-opening practice deeper into the general community. Suggested donation is $15 to $20 per session. Contact Weinstock at 212-0052 or lesleyweinstock@yahoo.com or Catherine at 252-6406 or catherine.d.cooley@gmail.com.